My Miss America Experience

Lately I have received lots of messages asking about my hair at the Miss America Pageant so, I figured I would give you the full, inside scoop on what happened behind the scenes (as far as my hair is concerned!). It has been almost one year since I was up on that stage in Las Vegas, and on live television. I can't believe so much time has passed! As a way to mark the anniversary of one of the greatest nights of my life, I wanted to reflect and give you a back stage pass to my prep for the pageant!

You may remember the piece that I won the title of Miss Delaware 2010 in, colored and styled by Bobbi Russell, owner of Hair Therapy for Women in Tampa, FL.

That piece remains as my "signature piece," as we call it at Hairloss.com. But, when it came time to prepare for the Miss America Pageant, I met with Mario Rispoli, owner of Salon Rispoli in Newark, DE and we decided it was time for a change! Every girl dreams of how she would love to look on one of the most important days of her life and Mario made those dreams come true for me.

I have been a short-haired/bald girl for over half  my life, and typically don't wear long, fussy hair on a day-to-day basis. It is just too much upkeep for a girl who didn't have hair after the age of eleven! But, once I selected my evening gown for the pageant, Mario and I both agreed longer hair would be the best partner. Why not glam it up to accessorize the most glamorous dress I may ever wear? So, we selected a piece that was down to my mid-back and Mario customized it for me by adding high and low lights and painting roots at the scalp to make it look natural- like it was growing out of my head! My largest priority was that it look natural and flow/move naturally, too. It was this piece that I wore almost the entire live telecast on ABC which included the opening number, introduction, announcement of "America's Choice', the swimsuit competition (@ 5:26), announcement of Top 12 and the evening gown competition. (Click there and fast forward to 1:03 to see my gown!)

We picked a very feminine and manageable style, the "Firenze", that would be able to last the entire telecast. Since the show is live, and very fast-pace; you don't have the opportunity, nor are you allowed, to meet again with your hair stylist. Mario styled my hair in loose curls with a curling iron, and about a gallon of hair spray.We chose to not cut many layers so that it was easier to pin up when necessary.

Another bit of inside scoop- most of the girls did their own makeup for the competition (including me!), and several even styled their own hair!

My team knew I would need to dance in a completely different wig, since there was no time for restyling. I danced to Micheal Jackson's "The Way You Make Me Feel" in a custom fit version of my "signature style". I was terrified to dance on live television with a wig, so Mario shaved my head to remove any peach fuzz, and applied the wig with industrial strength tape to put my mind at ease! And sure enough, that wig didn't move a bit while I pranced around that slick stage! This hair piece had to be pulled back halfway so I could safely dance without hair flying into my face. But, we wanted it to still look natural and feminine. So, with about fifteen bobby pins, and another can of hair spray- the hair was styled perfectly!

Then, after the talent competition, I quickly put my original/longer/curly hair back on! How neat is it that I had the fortune of changing my hair almost every day? I was able to sleep in while my adorable roommate, Kylie Kofoed Bruneel, Miss Idaho, woke up early to wash her hair, blow dry and style it! After a quick shower, and some quality mirror time with my makeup case, I threw on my hair and was ready for the day in minutes!

The funniest part is how my hair traveled to Las Vegas, NV, where the pageant was held. I carried my competition evening gown and my signature hair piece on the plane with me. But, the rest of my hair (6 pieces in total) arrived a day later in a neatly arranged package! Mario put the hair on mannequins, covered them with hair nets, wrapped in a soft fabric and nestled between folds of tissue paper and packing filling. What a delightful package to receive!

Before the show, Mario was the best person I could have with me. He constantly lifted me up when I needed a boost of energy, he brought me food each day (which is truly the way to my heart), and had done all the legwork for my hair during the day time. So, when he and I were together before the preliminary competitions, we just sat around snacking and chatting while everyone else ran around like crazy to be sure their hair was styled in time! Then he put the wig on my head about a minute before call time and off I went! Who says wigs are inconvenient???

So you see, pageants don't have to be all kinds of crazy behind the scenes! If you are lucky, you can relax and enjoy those once in a lifetime moments and not worry about the little details- like hair! :)

Be sure to leave your questions for me and suggestions for future posts! Visit our Facebook page, Kayla's Corner for Women & Children with Hairloss!

Have a great day!

Holiday Wishes

Hi everyone!


I have some great posts coming up for you all in the new year- including a few fun tutorials! But, for this week I thought I would reflect on the holidays and some of the recent messages I have received.


With the support work I do for women with hair loss, I receive quite a few messages each day. Just recently I have noticed the vast difference in each of those messages which showcases the different ways we women cope with change.


One woman sent me a note saying that all she wanted for Christmas was for her daughter's hair to grow back. And that her New Year resolution would be to fundraise money for Alopecia research to find a cure.


Another young woman, sent me a note saying that her Christmas present to herself was to stop complaining and worrying about her hair loss and to find a new and improved outlook.


These messages had me reflecting on past holidays in my life. I know last Christmas, my greatest wish would have been to become Miss America in January. Three holidays ago, I was wishing to save enough money to be able to afford the wig that I had fallen in love with! And twelve Christmases ago, I was curious if my hair was ever going to grow back, or not.


While I know that every person is different- I have learned that the greatest gift you can give yourself is love and positivity. You may not be able to make your hair grow back, or you may not have the hair you absolutely love. The one thing you can control is your outlook on the situation, and learn to love yourself just as you are.


This holiday season, whether you are celebrating Hannukah, Christmas or just time with your family, I encourage you to give yourself the greatest gift of all- love. For some people that may mean seeking a salon to find the perfect wig for them, so they can look in the mirror and love what they see. For others, that may mean learning to look in the mirror just as they are and still love what they see. There is no price or pretty packaging you can put on that.


So do me a favor this holiday- wake up in the morning, and enjoy being with your friends and/or family. But give yourself a gift and look in the mirror that night. Then say out loud (even if it feels awkward!) that you are beautiful. Because you are.


I am sending you all lots of love and sweet hugs from our Christmas in Delaware to your holidays across the country. Have a safe and joyous week everyone!

**This is me without makeup, and of course, Bridgette is sans makeup as well :) Tweet me your pictures of your holiday @missdelaware10 or @hairlossdotcom I'd love to see how you are celebrating!

My Winter Approach

If you have been following the blog, you will know that I went many years without wearing a wig at all. And although I do love the wigs I have now, I actually attend the beginning of each semester without my wig. This way, I have the option to come to class with or without it at any point, without the weird stares.

Now that the semester is coming to an end, I have found myself more recently wearing my wig to class. Not because my comfort level has changed... but because the temperature has changed! I now live in the DC area, and our winters are pretty chilly! Some days I opt to leave my knit cap and chunky scarf at home, and wear my wig instead!

For those of you who also have Alopecia, or who may have weak immune systems, like mine- you will know that part of keeping yourself healthy in the wintertime is keeping yourself warm! Remember when you were growing up and your parents would tell you to wear warm socks and a warm hat? That is because we lose some of our body heat from our head and our feet. If you walk outside completely bald, you may feel extra chilly, just as you would walking outside barefoot or with a tank top.

How many of you are more likely to wear your hair when it is colder outside?

Another thought to consider is keeping your scalp moisturized this time of year! Much like the rest of the skin on your body, your scalp can become chapped- especially during cold weather season. If you have never used lotion on your head, I suggest you begin by applying conditioner to your scalp in the shower and rinse as usual. Then try applying a hypoallergenic, sensitive skin lotion on your scalp, very lightly. Allow it to dry before wearing your wig or hat. If you know your skin is generally sensitive, consider speaking to a dermatologist before applying anything.

For me, I always knew wintertime meant my hair was going to start falling out again. My hair loss has never been constant. Generally, my hair would fall out during the fall and winter, and begin growing back over the summer months. This pattern has since gone away, but as a teenager, it was rather predictable. There are no studies that conclusively link weather or seasons to hair loss at this point. But, I can confidently share that whenever I spend a great amount of time in the sun, or even sunbeds (as unsafe as they may be!), I have typically shown regrowth! Just so you know, you can spend time under the sun or in a sun bed, wear sunscreen and still reap the benefits of the light. Sunlight can even help improve your mood!

Has anyone else noticed these patterns?

Have you noticed any changes, with the season? Or, do you have any other tips or tricks I haven't included?
Leave your comments here or on Facebook by joining the group, Kayla Martell's Corner for Women & Children with Hair Loss! Hope to see you there!

Happy holidays everyone!

Dating and Hair Loss

Hello friends!

I had a completely different post in mind for this week. Then I received a message from a woman, which sparked an all-new topic! For all you ladies who are out and about on the dating circuit- the idea of explaining to a handsome prospect that you aren't exactly what you seem to be, might seem a little frightening. I will tell you, what I am certain your loved ones have also told you- if he doesn't accept you just as you are, then he isn't worth your time.

In the meantime, that belief won't calm your nerves for when the time comes to have that conversation with him.

I must be upfront, and share that I met my fiancé, Kevin, over five years ago before I ever began wearing wigs. Thankfully, he accepted me as I was, and the only conversation I fully thought through was how to tell him I had decided to get a wig after all these years.

To begin, make your first decision- whether to go on your first date with or without the wig. There are upsides to both options. The benefit of going on a first date without the wig is that you essentially "bite the bullet" and get any awkwardness out of the way immediately. Then, before you know it, your hair loss is an afterthought. The upside to wearing your wig on the first date is allowing yourself the opportunity to determine if you like him enough to see him again and share something personal about yourself. I completely understand that this will be the most difficult decision of all and depends upon other circumstances such as how you appeared when you first met, where you are going on your date, your own comfort level and so on.

If you decide to go on your first date without your wig, then go into the day/night with the best attitude and confidence that you have within you! This is a side of you he will be seeing quite a bit if there is any future for your relationship! If he doesn’t bring it up first, then take the initiative to lay it all on the table at the very beginning. That way you aren't worried about it the whole time!

If you opt to wear your hair on your first date, then you will want to decide what timing is right for you to open up with him. Let's be honest, there are far worse things to keep from someone when you first meet them, but there will be no future for you two, if you keep a part of who you are as a secret. Promise yourself that you won't wait too long to open up with him. There is no magic formula, but I suggest that you tell him before you make any commitments to each other, spend a full night together, or maybe by the second date!

The conversation does not have to be awkward or uncomfortable by any means. But, you don't want to wait for the "right moment" because it may never come. Let some time pass where you are conversing and/or catching up with each other. Then make a note that you have something you'd like to share with him and you hope it will allow him to get to know you a little better. Explain that you have Alopecia, Breast Cancer, whatever the case may be, and that you have lost your hair. If you have Alopecia, you will want to explain that it is an autoimmune condition that causes your hair to fall out. It is not contagious, nor is it terminal. There are no other side effects, and you are otherwise healthy. You could then explain your own journey with Alopecia..."I first lost my hair when I was eleven, but the doctors couldn't figure out what was wrong. So then less than a year later, I was finally in a dermatologist's office learning about Alopecia and what my options were." If you are going through chemotherapy, then share whatever you are comfortable telling him- when you first found out, how your treatments are going, and so on.

It should be noted that there are wigs that can be bonded to your head if you have total hair loss, so for some- this decision may be irrelevant if that is the path you choose.

My suggestion would be to remain as open and as confident as possible. Know that if he has lots of questions, that is a great sign! It means he is genuinely interested. And if he doesn't ask any questions, consider that he may be trying to let everything soak in. Trust your instincts to interpret his reaction. After it is done, you will feel like a weight has been lifted of your chest, and you can let him really get to know you- the real you! No, your hair loss should not define you. But, it is a part of who you are- and when building a relationship, the only way for it to succeed is to be open and honest with the other person. Remember, no one is perfect, and I am certain there is something about your man that makes him different, too! You just may not know it yet.

Have a great week everyone! Be sure to psot your comments or questions of the Facebook Group "Kayla's Corner for Women and Children with Hair Loss" and follow me on Twitter for other updates www.twitter.com/missdelaware10